Barb’s Note: The following letter is from someone who has found himself in a position that most of us who have done the research about the state our nation is in can relate to. Surrounded by people who think you are a crazed conspiracy theorist, and knowing the truth, but unable to convey that truth to those closest to you. Read the following letter and understand that no matter your circumstances, you are not alone.

Letter from the Heart

By Barry Lane Tudor

Barbara, I know we don’t know each other much, but I sure do appreciate your activism. It has inspired me somewhat to become more active myself, although I am scared for a number of reasons, first being is I am still in the government system awaiting “retirement” in 6 years. I don’t think we’ll make it that far.

We are severely outnumbered, we are out-powered (media and military wise), we are slandered, ridiculed, and despised, they are taught to distrust us (the American people), to despise us. Even family members of mine think I am nuts for my “conspiracy” theories, which as you know are more related to true investigation and brutal honesty of my position in the military industrial complex. 

Will we be able to turn this terrible tide? They have had so long, they are so far…it is very scary. And the money…I have seen in my job the money flow more than quintuple for nutty ideas – like the big mobile evac ambulance video for instance. I am beginning to lose faith that we sane few can turn this insane tide.

Please if you can, continue to encourage me…you and Marti and Alex Jones and a very scant few others online are my only grasp onto reality anymore other than my grips upon nature and spirituality, which help keep me sane.

I have very few people I can relate truth with due to my position in the gov. I am the enemy combatant they train against, and I haven’t got any violence left within me other than self protection and sustenance for family. But I do have spirit, a brain, and this poor body, what is left of it. My spirit is crying out urgently to get out of here, but I remain trapped in my circumstances of life and will face the future here as it comes with this body.

The future is foreboding to me, my spirit tells me darkness is ahead, but there is a bright ray in the far future of hope for mankind. I cannot fathom the lies I swallowed throughout my life, only to awaken in this hour, eyebrows raised, fists clenched, and mad as hell. How could they ruin this most beautiful, free, independent country, and point us headlong into ruin, selling us out along the way?

I am angry at my fathers generation, his fathers generation, for it was their generations who were misled, who were misguided, who were passive enough to allow this to happen, and then my generation. My generation, who was lied to, told how free we were, how this was a nation of opportunity, how we were the greatest nation. We tried voting democrat, trying to change the tide of Vietnam. We lost ourselves in hedonistic pleasures, entertainment, drugs, cars, cheap gas and electricity, unending wealth and desecration of the flesh during the “good times” of the 70s through 80s. When the soviet union fell, I voted for republican for first time. I became that for several years, subscribing to Rush Limbaugh in Sacramento, even before he went national. Remember the egg stained billboards?

After all those changes, those turbulent years, I was starting to become an independent, tired of the lies train of republicrats and lies of demlicans alike, I became a libertarian. I could no longer listen to Rush Limbaugh, and found a little old man named Ron Paul, who started me off into libertarian party.

It was 911 that brought everything into focus for me. In about 2003, I became totally aware of a great many things I was ignorant of before. In 2003 I also found Alex Jones website and show. I watched documentaries, did some slight investigative work on my own through my channels, and found truth at last. Now everything seemed to fit into a pattern I could recognize.

I found a great many other sites of like mind, including Farmwars, which is one of my favorites. You girls got it. I wish I knew people like you in my life to talk to, like minded. I seem to be surrounded by hardline republicans, military, who hate my kind of person with a prejudice a black man might understand, only because I dare to question authority, to investigate alternative news, to try to find out what is going on.

I think I have found out what is going on, but to my great consternation, I am a huge minority, and furthermore, talking about the forbidden subject has driven wedges in my familial relationships that I found very disconcerting. I have tried to talk seriously and deeply about the situations we are facing, but get denounced, called un-American, called traitor, am ridiculed. Some spout republican crap. Some spout democrat crap. They believe the lie like it was the truth, and will fight against the truth with all their might, like good ignorant fools do.

Sorry to spout like this, but I wanted to know if you have any similarity to this on your end? At times, Barbara, I wonder if my family is right…I must be crazy. But the truth I have found is, that it is the TRUTH that is crazy. Crazy people could not make up crazier stuff than the truth of where we are as a nation.

Thanks for being there, and FYI my middle son, 27, is joining the army. Against my wishes, but it is his life. He thinks I am insane…youth…


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5 Responses to “Letter from the Heart”

  1. nedlud says:

    Good letter, Barry.

    We’re on a bad stretch of road right now.

    Amerika ain’t what it pretends to be.

    your friend,

  2. How many of you are being plundered and harmed on a daily basis by road nazies disguised as peace officers? (peace officers. what irony)
    We as a small group here in Oregon are on a mission to stop this road piracy by those who are suppose to serve and protect our rights and liberty and the den’s of corruption many call courts that condone and support this industry of fraud and corruption.

    You can also visit our site for more information and possible options to your legal issues.

  3. Visionaerie says:

    Fear not — there are a growing number of kindred harmonizing voices out here in the wilderness, like me. We just need to keep telling the truth about what is going on, and make inroads the best we can. And maybe the best revenge is learning to live well — and laugh at political follies (even though they are the most expensive form of entertainment). There are so many positive trends at the grass-roots level — like I discovered a raw milk supplier just a few miles from here. Like Thomas Paine said, “Time makes more converts than reason.” As long as we keep making our points in a rational way, we can win the day. After all, wasn’t the American Revolution won by a committed and passionate minority of activists?

  4. Holly says:

    Dear Barry,

    Rod has so wisely summed things up. There are many of us who can relate to what you feel and have written. I have only been awakened for about 7-8 months now and do constant research. What I have found has been horrifying and disturbing. In trying to spread the word, I have largely been ignored and chastised, especially being a FORMER democrat. I have lost friends and even contact with family members, however, I do make some inroads.

    The best success I have had is with strangers, such as the lady who works at the post office (today) or a restaurant owner or a grocery store clerk. I just throw in casual, leading comments in a pleasant tone.

    Hang in there. There are lots of us. I found one really excellent contact by going to a preppers forum. We don’t agree on everything, but she and her husband get most of it. It was a breath of fresh air.

    Also, keep listening to AJ and try or patriots network. There are all sorts of good sources out there. Don’t give up whatever you do. I have children too, though younger than yours, and will continue to stand up on their behalf by emailing and calling representatives.

    Again, whatever you do, do not give up hope. Every one of us makes a difference and especially someone as knowledgable and well-researched as you.

    Thank you so much for sharing and expressing what so many of us are feeling and going through.

    Stand your ground and believe in TRUTH.


  5. My dear brother, let me post a couple of quotes for you that may set you free from this insanity. I know because I too deal with the very same issues.

    “In the beginning of change, the Patriot is a scarce man; brave, hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, however, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.” Mark Twain

    “A truth’s initial commotion is directly proportional to how deeply the lie was believed. When a well-packaged web of lies has been sold gradually to the masses over generations, the truth will seem utterly preposterous and its speaker, a raving lunatic.” –Dresden James

    “A nation can survive its fools, and even the ambitious. But it cannot survive treason from within. An enemy at the gates is less formidable, for he is known and carries his banner openly. But the traitor moves amongst those within the gate freely, his sly whispers rustling through all the alleys, heard in the very halls of government itself. For the traitor appears not a traitor; he speaks in accents familiar to his victims, and he wears their face and their arguments, he appeals to the baseness that lies deep in the hearts of all men. He rots the soul of a nation, he works secretly and unknown in the night to undermine the pillars of the city, he infects the body politic so that it can no longer resist. A murderer is less to fear. The traitor is the plague.”
    Marcus Tullius Cicero

    “A nation of well educated men who have been taught to understand and cherish their God given rights cannot be enslaved. It is through the regions of ignorance and apathy that tyranny prevails.

    “If we know the truth, we must tell it; if we don’t, we must learn it!” It is critical to our spirit.

    “None are more enslaved then those who think they are free.”

    My own quote, “It is bad enough that many will perish believing the BIG lie, but the real tragedy are those who have, are now and will be sacrificing their lives defending the BIG lie.”

    Hang in there brother. The battle is just beginning.
    It is a spiritual battle, so keep your trust and faith in the Lord because it sure isn’t man that is going to save our rear end in this picture.

    blessings, Rod